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Happy Thanksgiving [Nov. 27th, 2008|04:56 pm]
[Current Mood |contentcontent]

I. Am. So. Full.

It was a very quiet Thanksgiving for my family this year. No extended family came over, there was no awkwardness. It was nice.

I know that I bitch and moan about things, sometimes rightfully so, sometimes not, but really I am a pretty blessed person in a lot of ways. I have my brothers and my son, who are wonderful, and some pretty fabulous friends who make up for what might be lacking otherwise. I have a roof over my head, clothing on my back and am in no danger of starving. I am most definitely blessed.

Anyway, that's enough of my post-thanksgiving-dinner-pre-nap-daze rambling.

Happy Thanksgiving folks.
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(no subject) [Nov. 4th, 2008|09:02 am]
So I've voted.

Again the wait.

Commence the nail biting.
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New Experiences & Family Guilt [Nov. 2nd, 2008|05:17 am]
[Current Mood |tiredtired]
[Current Music |The hum of my fan.]

Been an age and a half since I updated anything, but hey, if anyone is reading this still. I'm alive. Hooray.

So I'm thirty now. It feels pretty much the same as 29 did. I did have an odd moment a couple of days ago when thinking to myself about how I was a person in my 20's...wait, no, I'm a person in my 30's now. I guess a decade of being something is hard to shake. I'll get used to it though, it's not like I can take it back because I don't like how it fits.

I was in my first real car accident.


My usual birthday luck came three days late, but it was there waiting in the wings. I knew it was coming, I could feel it. It wasn't bad, and it wasn't my fault. Just some woman who decided to back out of a parking space and not notice the car stopped behind her. She banged up my door and scared herself half-to-death. I ended up having to calm her down, and then insist that yes, we did indeed need to exchange insurance information. No, lady, I'm going to risk having my insurance canceled on me for you after you've just rammed my car. I'm still waiting to get it repaired, but it should hopefully be happening this Monday. We shall see.

So there's the potential that I might move to Missouri. It's not my ideal place, but it would be another temporary resting place. I'd have support there that I don't really have here in Oklahoma, and at least a couple of friends. It's tempting, especially because I'd be able to go back to school again. That's terrifying.

The trouble with this whole scenario is that if I do go, my mother will inevitably follow, and if we both go that leaves my grandmother here alone in this little town with only suck relatives nearby. That's worrisome. It's so strange that she can function in one aspect of her life, work, and excel at it, and yet simple things at home are just too much for her to do correctly.

For those of you who don't know, I do live with my grandmother who, though on the surface seems like she could, really cannot live alone. She doesn't cook anymore, she never seems to have any inclination to. The most I've seen her do in the last year and a half is reheat something or cook a sausage in a skillet.

The usual routine is that I will cook dinner, and then after I'm done with dinner, she will put things away. This has been the routine since her stroke, but lately she can't seem to do that. She gets distracted and walks away half-way through, or just doesn't put things away. The last two days in a row, half the food has been put away, and the other half left sitting out on the counter. She'll even put it in a container and then just leave it on the counter.

I'm honestly thankful that she's not more inclined to cook because I fear what might happen if she were to walk away and forget about something on the stove or in the oven.

Wow.. Whine, whine, whine.

Halloween was pretty good. The actual Halloween was nerve wracking because my son went to a football game with a friend of his, and this is the first time he's really gone out to a huge event without me. With someone else, and their parents, in their car. It may not seem like a big deal, but I tell you I could have had a heart attack waiting for the boy to get home. He did though, safely and elated at what a great time he'd had in spite of a complete lack of interest in football.

The day that people were allowed to celebrate Halloween by trick or treating was decent. I say it this way because the crazy little town I live in has this habit of changing the day in which a kid can go trick or treating. Apparently Sunday, Wednesday and Friday are all not acceptable days for it. Sunday - Church day. Wednesday - Bible study. Friday - Football games. So yes, the kids were informed that they were to go on November 1st rather than October 31st.


My son had fun, though got tired of it quickly after trying to jog around in a cape and mask. He decided that his mask didn't have enough air holes in it and quit after about 20 minutes, but he'd managed a decent stash regardless. I get to enjoy the pitter-patter of pre-adolescent feet as my son runs up and down the walls on a sugar high. Wheee.

I think that's about it. I'm beat, it's insanely late and I should be sleeping, so goodnight!
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Writer's Block: Your Favorite Series: One Last Go Round [Aug. 21st, 2008|10:13 am]

If you could pick any TV show that has been off the air to come back for one more season, which show would you pick and why?
Firefly, for sure, followed closely by Arrested Development.
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(no subject) [Aug. 21st, 2008|09:57 am]
[Current Mood |geekygeeky]

So I haven’t posted a while, but I figured that I would post for any of you that I don’t talk to on a regular basis to let you know that yes, I am indeed still alive!

I’m sure you’re relieved.

I’ve had ups and downs as is pretty normal.. lets see..

I still live in Oklahoma. Down

My brother and his wife are coming to visit next month. Up

I was supposed to visit a friend this Friday/Saturday but that had to be cancelled. Down

Said friend has things happening in their life which makes visits less possible. Definite down

A different friend of mine and I got wrangled in by management at our job to help create a better training program for our current work project. Up..I think?

Tristen is back in school. Always a bummer at first, but it’s an up for the most part.

My grandmother’s health, while still a bit off, seems to have leveled for now. Down and Up.

Okay, enough with the list, you get the idea. It’s a rollercoaster as usual, but I’d say that’s just pretty standard. One of these days I’ll get on and be able to say, “I WON THE LOTTERY” or something equally fantastic and just have good news, but today is not that day.
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(no subject) [Apr. 2nd, 2008|05:26 am]
[Current Mood |groggygroggy]

It's amazing how two little migraine pills can screw you out of sleep.

On a happier note, my head doesn't hurt and my bathroom is much cleaner now.
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Bugs.. [Mar. 26th, 2008|03:28 am]
Let me just state something for some of you that might not know this about me.

I hate bugs.

Hate them.

I don't need to be told how some bugs have their uses, some are good for us, harmless, pretty, etc. I just don't like them. Especially the flying sorts. I am the type of person who won't kill the harmless ones most of the time, moths and so on usually get a free pass if they meander indoors and flutter about my ceiling. Lady bugs, sure, no problem. Most of them I just try to shoo out the door or window if there's one available.

Even the cicada that I found attached to the side of my purse one morning was caught in a jar and put outside.


Looked just like this.

Then you get to the other bugs, the icky ones that have stingers and teeth, that can bite and sting and cause you much pain. Those I just don't like in my room at all, and for some reason they seem to love to find their way into my room right before I plan on going to bed.

I'll lay back and boom, one will be crawling around the ceiling over my bed so that all I can do is imagine the thing flying down and, I don't know, stinging, biting, injecting me with it's radiation laced venom and turning me into some strange web slinging superhero. Finally I have to do something.

Well, it happened again this morning, getting into bed there was a gigantic black wasp chilling on my ceiling. So then I have to talk myself into doing something about it, not because I don't want it gone but because killing bugs just grosses me out. The feeling when you squish them. I hate it. Even with the evil stinging bugs. So working myself up into doing something took a good 10 minutes as I stared at it and contemplated trying to go to bed with that thing up there.

Finally I decided to do something, so I start poking at it with a broom stick, which was completely ineffective as it would just scooch over a fraction of an inch and then stop. I'm not sure what I was trying to accomplish except to maybe just get it away from my bed, but the damn thing wasn't moving.

So you understand why it's such a chore, parts of my ceiling are as high as 15+ feet up, which makes bug killing difficult at best. Next step was the bug spray, which I am loathe to use, but I really, really, really wanted the thing gone and I couldn't reach it to get it into any kind of jar or anything. So I spray, and it freaks out, dive bombs me so that I feel it in my hair and then flies back up at the ceiling again. Naturally I scream and wave my arms around to try and dislodge the already fled insect, but it wasn't done with me yet. Oh no. I decided at that point that I needed a weapon, so I find this piece of wood that i had sitting behind my TV stand for some reason and scoot towards my bed, and the damn thing dives again. Not as close this time, but close enough that I can hear the buzzing of it's wings, then hovers level with my face right over my bed. I think the thing was taunting me. So I swing my piece of wood like I'm a baseball player trying to hit one out of the park and make contact, the thing goes flying into the corner and stays down on the ground.

Even with my dislike of these kinds of bugs, I try to put the thing out of it's misery quickly. I don't want it to suffer, so I try to squish it with the board. About 30 times until it stopped moving, either because my carpet is so soft or because the damn thing was that tough. It was horrible.

So now the thing is dead, and I'm all grossed out. Feeling like there are insects crawling on me on occasion when there isn't anything there. Ick. Bugs. I hate Oklahoma.. all the bugs here are so large.
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Rooster or Hen [Mar. 18th, 2008|03:07 pm]
[Current Mood |amusedamused]

So a few days ago my family and I go out to eat at a restaurant for dinner. The place was sort of like a Denny's style family eatery decorated in the "cowboy" style, as my son would put it. Longhorns on the wall, stars, for Texas I assume. You get the idea.

We order, get dinner, everything was really good, but my son of course has to get up at some point during the meal to use the restroom. After about a minute of being gone he comes back looking confused and asks, "Mom, they don't have 'Men's and Women's', on the doors, they have 'Rooster's and Hen's'. Which one do I use?"

Can't tell he grew up in a city, can you?
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(no subject) [Mar. 1st, 2008|11:55 pm]
[Current Mood |tiredtired]

So I haven't written here in a while.

Life has been.. life. I don't want to write because I feel like I just bitch about things in my life all the time, like there's nothing good. There is good, small good between the consistent bigger bad that seems to keep hitting.

Good things.. Lets see.

My brother wants me to move to Oregon and move in with he and his wife. I may do that this year once my son is out of school. Nothing is certain at all, though I have started applying for jobs there to get things rolling.

I went to the Museum of Natural History today with my son, and that was pretty cool. Have some neat pictures of things there, may post some later.

A friend is supposed to visit in April, so that could be cool.

And the bad.

My grandmother, the one who has been having the strokes, has been acting weird lately, but she either doesn't realize it or she doesn't want to admit it. It might be stress from life, but there are other physical things that are happening, things like having a lot more trouble keeping her balance. She stumbles a lot, bumps into things, a lot more then she used to. She's never been graceful, but it's gotten worse.

She's also apparently utterly incapable of judging what is healthy and what is not. We've been working (fighting) to get a healthier diet for her, and it was going better, then she started to rebel with lunches. She makes the claim that she's eating a healthy lunch, but when I started looking at what she's eating, well.. she's eating salad, yes, but a salad topped with meat (steak, sausage, bacon) cheese, cruotons and dressing does not fall into that category. Getting her to understand this is another matter entirely. It wouldn't be so bad if it were just a little of each thing, but I kid you not, the other day she put up an entire cut up steak on top of a salad for lunch.


It's frustrating, but there's only so much we can do.

Then there's my great-grandmother who went into the hospital a few weeks ago. She had some serious abdominal pain going on, to the point that they had her on a morphine drip, and ended up having an obstructed bowel. Ouch. So they went in for surgery, almost telling us to expect her to die during the surgery without actually saying it. They did that whole "Prepare yourselves" thing.

She ended up coming through the surgery better then expected, which was great. She was starting to recover really well, no longer in pain, looking like she was going to be released in a couple weeks.

Then a couple days later, she started having some troubles again and, well, to not give too many details, due to a hysterectomy many a year ago, her bladder is fallen and she can't empty it all the way. The only way to fix this is more surgery, and they refuse to do it because she's 90 and has just undergone surgery, so she's had to have a catheter put in and they are no longer saying she's going to be released soon. They have her on antibiotics to prevent infection, and she's doing OK otherwise, which is good, but the fact that they've stopped talking about releasing her is a bit worrying. Living in a hospital can be so depressing, one of the reasons that she's lived on her own this whole time. Yes, she is 90 and still has her own place. She's stubborn. That must be where I get it from.

Anyway, all of this has been happening and I'm still sick. I haven't wanted to complain about that either. It's not as bad as it was, but it's not going away, and because I've been sick I haven't wanted to visit my Nana in the hospital for fear of giving her this and making her even worse.

So there you have it. The good and the bad.

And now, time to sleep.

Or to catch up on Lost.
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The bright side? [Dec. 23rd, 2007|11:35 pm]

Something good that has come out of all of this is that somehow we've managed to weasel out of having a full on dinner with relatives. We're doing dinner at home and desserts with extended family.

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